My friend Parker once almost caught a goose. I say almost, because he came home that day lamenting the failure, his baggy sweatpants mud-caked and his hands scuffed. He wouldn't know what to do with it if he caught it, but it meant the world to him. Enough, apparently, to _literally_ dive head-first at the beast encumbered even as he was with art supplies and a backpack.
Parker is Awesome.

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